孩子不是父母的私产，也没有义务成为父母的面子。他们是上帝放在父母书包里的作业，只不过完成这份作业需要十几年，甚至更长时间。不要因为这周期的漫长就看不到交作业的那一天，也不要企图照抄别人的作业，上帝给每个人出的题目都不一样。父母必须先提升自己，读懂自己那道题———即了解孩子的本色，看清楚上帝到底发给你一张怎样的牌，才有可能做对那道题。
孩子
Children
你的孩子并非你的孩子。
他们是生命因对自身的渴望
而诞下的儿女
他们由你而来，但并不始自于你，
他们虽然在你身边，
但并不属于你，
你可以爱他们，
但不能把你的思想强加给他们，
因为他们有自己的思想。
你可以庇护他们的身体，
但不能囚禁他们的灵魂，
因为他们的灵魂属于明天，
你做梦也无法抵达的明天。
你可以努力去模仿他们，
但不要试图让他们重复你
因为生命从不倒退，
也不在昨日停留。
你是弓，
孩子是由此离弦的箭。
弓箭手瞄准小路尽头的目标，
用他的神力将你拉满，为的是让他的箭飞得又快又远。
就在他的手中欣然弯曲吧，
因为他既爱那飞翔的箭，也喜欢稳定的弓
– 纪伯伦
【注：弓箭手是上帝，弓是父母，箭就是孩子。父母要接受孩子本来的样子，那是上帝赋予他们的各自的本色】
Your children are not your children.
They are the sons and daughters of Life’s longing for itself.
They come through you but not from you,
And though they are with you, yet they belong not to you.
You may give them your love but not your thoughts.
For they have their own thoughts.
You may house their bodies but not their souls,
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow, which you cannot visit,
not even in your dreams.
You may strive to be like them, but seek not to make them like you.
For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.
You are the bows from which your children as living arrows are sent forth.
The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite,
and He bends you with His might that His arrows may go swift and far.
Let your bending in the archer’s hand be for gladness;
For even as he loves the arrow that flies, so He loves also the bow that is stable.
– Kahlil Gibran
